A Blythe Coach

Fall leaves, drinks, yoga tools

Dealing with Difficult Developments – 15 Ways to Cope with Challenges & Setbacks

Many I know experience the recent Primary Election results in the United States as very bad news.

It feels like the world is on fire and I’m so afraid of the sinister agenda of those rising to power and the predictably terrible impacts for American people I know, myself included. The outlook under such an administration is not good for teachers or education, culture, the arts, humanities, even science and healthcare. Our expression of personhood, the safety and rights of LGBTQIA2S+, AFABs, especially people of color, immigrants, trans people are all in danger. Alarmingly, democracy itself seems threatened.

People have thoughtfully been asking how I (as American abroad, as teacher, as friend) feel about it all, both here in Germany and my dears in the US and elsewhere. Not doing so well, to be honest!

It is taking me a bit of time to process and grieve a bit before I can start to articulate an answer to that. Just trying to cope, and will use all the tools at my disposal to recover and then constructively respond.

That said, I will not allow political events or other challenges to permanently derail my work, my mission and vision, but am committed to transmuting it to fuel my creativity and connection.

Dealing with Difficult Developments Bullet Journal brainstorm spread

Bad News Bears

Maybe it’s some other hard news or tricky times you’re navigating instead or in addition to the global political drama. Unwanted diagnoses or unexpected professional or personal changes happen. I am no strangers to these strange twists of fate.

Unfortunately at such overwhelming moments, we can tend to forget how to get through them. It may be that the only way out is through, as with all types of grief, but there are still tools available to us, wherever we are in the struggle. When we’re in it, it may not be easy to see how this particular unexpected or unwanted change may lead to growth, insights, and benefits beyond our current context.

Hard times come to us all, so how can we bounce back and recover? Here are the tools that work for me when I need to cope with difficult developments and which I share with clients and students to support their commitment to what’s important in their lives despite setbacks.

Leaning on them now and curious to hear what you find works best for you!

1. Take a Time Out

Find a safe place to process the news. Cry, vent, grieve the future you pictured and your attachment to the results you wanted.

Sometimes we have to put aside time for this and otherwise function at work, school, and other commitments. This is difficult, but take whatever time you can, be as generous with yourself as you can be since the more space you have to properly process and recover by various means, the easier it will be to come out on the other side of the funk.

Repeat as necessary.

2. Audit Inputs

Taking time and space to renew yourself includes being selective about news outlets, social media, reading, listening, and viewing. Consider limiting screen time, and creating other healthy boundaries as needed.

I have found un-following sources that consistently make me feel bad and purposely consuming more empowering and inspiring content has a positive effect on my mental health. Stop subscribing to disempowering or otherwise negative sources, at least for a while.

This is not one-and-done, but rather needs to happen periodically, much as other physical and digital decluttering does.

In the past, I’ve ditched accounts that promote diet culture, unhealthy beauty standards, heteronormativity, transphobia, and gender-essentialism and also anything that just makes me feel bad, even if I’m not sure why.

Instead, I hand-pick which social media sources are in my feeds wherever possible and then limit how often I’m there and how much time I spend. Some accounts I’ve found wonderfully supportive recently:

3. Process & Express

Depending on your personal needs, processing difficult news will look differently. Going through the thoughts and feelings that arise may be done best alone, just crying it out, writing in a notebook or otherwise releasing thoughts and feelings, or with a trusted friend, family member, or professional.

In Reflective Practice Through Journaling, I wrote about Therapeutic and other kinds of personal writing that professionals recommend and that I find valuable in my own practice.

A therapist, counselor, or coach may be helpful. As a trained life coach with InsideTrack (Master Certified Coach) and Accomplishment Coaching (Certified Graduate) with years of experience as a one-to-one coach I consider myself a catalyst in every setting, with my goal to bring forth brilliance in the community and witness human potential unfold. If you’d like to explore working with me in this capacity, schedule a consultation and to discuss my 3-month Signature Coaching Program and ontological coaching services.

In any case, find a way to let out your feelings & thoughts and find a constructive way forward.

Blythe with red and orange fall leaves wet from the rain

4. Tune in to Your Senses

Aromas & oils, rosewater, beloved scents. Favorite baked goods, experiences, places, landscapes, or views may all help you be present and feel a bit better.

5. Find Comfort

Self-Care exquisitely as you can and also lean into resources such as caring people and pets. Creature comforts like baths, blankets, flannel sheets and pajamas, soothing the senses in your favorite ways can help us feel safe and secure in order to recover.

Taking care of these needs seems so basic, but when we’re confronted with strong emotion and hard times, we can tend to forget what can help us feel better or at least supported as we ride the waves of life.

A spa day would be amazing, but any little bit of care and pampering can make a difference in our sense of well-being.

Writing with cappuccino (with a heart in the foam!) in flannel sheets in bed

6. Nourish

Nourishment, snacks, treats, and hot or appropriate-temperature favorite beverages also fall into this category. Plenty of nutrients, hydration, and satiation.

It might not solve all of our problems to eat, but being hungry does not help us to feel secure and comfort meals or dishes can be a way to care for self and others. If you notice an unhealthy relationship to food and eating, this is something to look into with a professional’s help.

In the below video I’m indulging in several comforting activities: eating my favorite fresh-baked pumpkin muffins, drinking a delicious cappuccino, and playing with fountain pens and ink, a new hobby. I’ve got a candle, some crystals and essential oils nearby.

New Inks, Old Pens, Muffins, Coffee & a cat creatively coping YouTube video

7. Get Outside

Fresh air, sunlight, new views, movement, getting outdoors even briefly can create a big shift and even breakthroughs. Get into nature, see new perspectives walking or observing closely.

Sketching, photography, birdwatching, plant & animal identification, botany, hiking or mountain biking, looking at the water or sailing on it, there are so many ways to benefit.

Laacher See / Lake with autumn colors

8. Mindful Movement

Dance is my number one, and research supports it’s advantages! Maybe your groove is also moving to the music, but Yoga, Qigong, Tai Chi and other Martial Arts or Sports might be your thing. Pranayama, Breathwork, and Meditation also have powerful positive effects.

You don’t have to be “good” at any of these activities in order to experience the benefits engaging in them. Jolynne Anderson, my life coach since my coach training program with Accomplishment Coaching, is a joyful mover herself, one of the topics of this insightful article and podcast.

Perhaps you might find something of interest on the A Blythe Coach YouTube Channel where since 2020 I’ve been sharing Ballet, Dance, & Yoga Videos and Playlists with warmups, exercises, tutorials, and diverse tools and techniques for creative people.

Wonderful Warmers, one of a library of playlists on the A Blythe Coach YouTube Channel

It would also be a pleasure to have you in my live Mindful Movement Classes In-Studio & Online (Ballet, Barre a Terre, Dance, Yoga…) to move together at home or anywhere in the world!

9. Mood Music

Along the lines of engaging all the senses and potentially moving the body, music that embraces or alters the mood can make a big difference. Listening to particular songs, albums, or pieces of music will bring powerful associations.

Wallow in the feels with musical selections to match and really get it all out. Change the tone with something uplifting. Search out or create a playlist that moves you like you want it to.

In addition to my library of Dance and Mindful Movement playlists and videos on YouTube, I also have a wide variety of seasonal and themed music playlists which I share publicly there. For example, a couple of current favorites are Harvest & Thanksgiving Songs and Music for Creativity & Productivity.

10. Connect with Community

Online, in-person, by mail; blood or chosen family, professional networking, interest groups, friends, fandoms. It doesn’t have to be many, but which folks are quality, who are your true blue crew?

Connect with them, let yourself be loved-up and supported and love up others in return. Maybe they are people, and maybe they are pets and other creatures around us.

It would be my pleasure to connect with you online via social media and/or my approximately-weekly Email Newsletter, itself a feast of dancey and creative living resources, featuring my latest creations and those of other awesome folks.

Rufio the cat on a pouf

11. Hobby it Up

Pursue personal interests, nerd out. Pick something new to try, a class, a craft, an instrument…or return to favorite pastimes you know tickle your fancy. Pursue a passion regardless of talent or personal profit, for the pure joy of it.

My latest pursuit is fountain pens and inks and it is proving both creative and diverting! Wrote about my love affair with this type of analog expression in Pen Friends – Inky Adventures in Writing and have posted a couple of chatty pen and ink videos to continue my EDC and creative supplies series.

Hot Mess Post-Election Pen & Ink Play video on YouTube

12. Read a Book

For me, ideally fiction such as a cozy mystery or Rom-Com, and also poetry. Whatever genre works for you, let yourself be transported, shift perspectives, learn and imagine.

13. Create Art

Explore different media, draw, paint, collage, do ceramics. Get a body high with ecstatic dance, explore dance improvisation & choreography as a solo mover or join a group. Try a new technique, art class, or just doodle.

Creative writing, poems, stories, essays, novels, journaling. You get the idea, express yourself privately and publicly, as an amateur or professional.

Put yourself in the path of beauty and observe others’ works in galleries, museums, performances, collaborate, generate the world of your imagination.

Creative Challenges

Here are a few past creative coaching challenges that I have shared, with future opportunities like Dance Daily December to be announced:

Get Down Daily was one of my most fun challenges yet, and is ongoing!

14. Revel in Seasons & Holidays

Right now it’s fall and the convergence of the darkness of Daylight Savings time and anxiety about global politics and the well being of my loved ones have converged to create seasonal blues.

Thus, I’m taking my vitamin D and have thrown myself into full Fall-into-Winter mode. That means decorating my journal and house, listening to appropriate music, contemplating what to make and bake next and spending all of my free time covered in flannel and sipping hot cocoa.

My Thanksgiving and Christmas/Winter decorations, cards, stamps, ephemera…it’s all coming out bit by bit and I’ve gone ahead and started listening to this writing in a cozy Christmas cabin video/sound scene for writing and productive times.

15. Contribute Service

Activism, volunteering, charity. No matter how needy we are ourselves, there is likely someone in our community who could benefit from our time, energy, or spare change when we have the bandwidth again.

Soup kitchens and animal shelters are a great place to start, or perhaps there is an organization or cause that is dear to your heart. When we have the resources to give in whatever way we can, it does wonders to give to something larger than ourselves.

Resources for Further Exploration

Questions for Reflection

  • What challenges are you currently facing?
  • Which voices and sources are you listening to and how do they make you feel?
  • What sounds, scents, tastes, sights, and other sensations help you to ground and be present?
  • Which resources do you need to connect with to take the next step?
  • What kind of dance (or art, or work) will you create from this?

Let’s keep in touch, keep dancing, and never hesitate to let me know if I can be of service!

More dance, yoga, and coaching content coming at you again soon, would love to see you in my email newsletter or on social media until then!

Blythe Stephens, MFA, Bliss Catalyst
they/them or she/her
Creator of A Blythe Coach: dance through your difficulties
and take leaps of faith into a joyful, fulfilling life

DISCLAIMER: A Blythe Coach recommends that you consult your physician regarding the applicability of any recommendations and follow all safety instructions before beginning any exercise program. When participating in any exercise or exercise program, there is the possibility of physical injury. If you engage in this exercise or exercise program, you agree that you do so at your own risk, are voluntarily participating in these activities, assume all risk of injury to yourself.

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